.......you fill in the blank and you've got a following.  The whole system of marketing is telling us how to improve ourselves. 

How to have a better marriage.. home....future.....waistline....business.  Or it could be how to BE a better parent, wife, team player and finally.....Christian.   There's nothing wrong with self improvement.  Actually it's very right.  

But how to have what really matters?  Peace?  Contentment? Love?  A pure heart?  These always have - and continue to be- things that escape our pay grade. Things we are unable to self improve ourselves in to.

Only the power of the Holy Spirit can make TRUE and LASTING changes inside us.  Only. God. 

And only when we ask.

We don't ask because we aren't hearing things like "Let LOVE be your highest goal" (1 Cor. 14) Only God can put the desire for what He desires in to my heart.. and yours. The things that MATTER to God are very often not the things that MATTER to churches... and to some Christians.   God is not putting a burden on you of spending a lifetime LEARNING how to be a better person. You can never be good enough to warrant being adopted by Him.  It's a gift. 

He isn't interesting in telling you how to have a better heart.....unless...you understand that 

He is interested in giving you one - if you ask. 

She was bent over in pain.  On her right side.  Her husband rushed her to the emergency room.  She got there just in time.. her appendix was about to burst.   Within hours, the infected organ was removed.  She spent a few days recuperating in the hospital.  Now, three years later, my friend is healthy and has moved on, and hardly thinks about the day she was so ill.

What was the first step toward her healing?  Answer:  PAIN.  She could not ignore the pain. She could not act like she wasn't in pain.  The deep pain caused her husband to do something to help her.  

Now imagine that story going another way.  Imagine, "A few years ago, my friend started to have really bad pain in her lower right side.  She was embarrassed for anyone to know she was in pain. So she locked the door to her bedroom and went in there to hide.  After a few hours, her husband knocked on the door, and she answered him with a moan.  He unlocked the door, and saw her on the floor, in obvious pain, writhing from it.  He gently closed the door and walked away because he didn't want to interfere and point out that it was obvious that there was something deep and ugly going on the inside of his wife.  The next morning, she was dead on the floor.  But.. thankfully, no one ever saw her in such deep pain."

Tragic, yes?  Yes.  But in so many ways, that's how we treat each other. We try to hide that something really painful is going on inside us.  We try to not point out to others that their pain is obvious. We just act like no one is in pain. And slowly, methodically, people are dying inside all around us.  Yesterday, I spent three hours on the phone with a woman I've know since she was a teenager at a Youth Camp where my husband and I were counselors.  She has made incredibly POOR choices all through her life.. but.. always picks herself up.. gets back to what she knows is right... and moves on.  Except...yesterday... I heard something in her voice that I have never heard before--- DEFEAT.  I know her family... but.. she will not allow me to call them and tell them she is in such pain.  I asked her to let me call her pastor.. and she said ok. So I did.  Her family has chosen to act like this sister, this daughter, living across the country is not in pain.. is not in trouble.  But she is.

The greatest traged for those of us who hide our pain is that Jesus came to heal it. Jesus came because we are NOT well... 

Maybe you wil call His name today.. maybe you will call one of His children today.. maybe you will ask for help today.  

And be healed.  

"Jesus..... told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have not come to call those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.” - Mark 2:17

A few hours before the sun set yesterday, we drove about 20 miles out in to the country, where dear friends had gathered for some fellowship.  We hadn't seen them in such a long time... they are busy.. we are busy.. but we all decided to make the time to be together.. for fellowship.. for prayer.   There were six adults, and oodles of kids. 

The setting was idyllic - warm Southern night next to an ice cold flowing creek.  The land belonged to the parents of one of the couples there.. and his dad has created a paradise around the creek.  Bridges, rubber rafts.  The kids were squealing, the adults were wading.  On the table was some fried chicken, piles of big strawberries, ice cold grapes, pasta salads. 

And we were so happy to see our friends.  When we got out of our car, one of the men came running to us.. hugging us... thrilled to see us.  If he hadn't run to us, we would have run to him... we love him. 

When we all left each other.......there was the aroma of love that only God can bring. When people pray together.  And love God intensely together.  And seek God intensely together.

Just thanking God today for the aroma of love that still lingers in my heart - and for ice cold creeks, crispy fried chicken, authentic fellowship with authentic people  AND FOR THE KIND OF LOVE THAT JUST LOVES YOU THE WAY YOU ARE- delights in your gifts........and applauds you and cheers you on.  In a world filled with people with agendas, people who are envious, people who don't love you, people who don't wish you well............it's nice for God to take a few minutes to remind me of the kind of existence He intends for His children to have.

Not everybody loves me.  But the people who do love me so much that I don't care about the ones who don't.  Everyone has someone who loves them.  Tell them today that you are thankful for that love.  It's very precious.

I have found, because of being in various positions in church ministry throughout my increasingly many decades....that......people do their best to put on a good front.  They try to look "normal" - whatever that is.  They hide their pain.  They hide their sin.  They hide their bondages.  They hide their loneliness.  I do too.  It's human nature to try and look good to people around you.  But... at times... we can judge others.. we can make assumptions about who they are.. and why they say and do the things they do... and we assume we know the whole story.  But we don't.  Only God does.

Don't assume you know why someone acts the way they do.  Just have mercy.

Think about your life.  Treat others the way you want others to treat you.  It isn't complicated. At all.

Life is not as hard as we make it.. unless we try to make it not so hard. 

It's the people who know that at any moment, life can hand you a crushing blow... who seem to have found the attitude that brings contentment.  It's the people who assume life should be easy - they should never be without any thing, any desire, any dream - who seem to fall apart when a bump in the road hits them, or the rain falls in their lives.   IN THE SAME WAY.......

Being a Christian is not as hard as we make it.....unless we try to make being a Christian not so hard. 

I don't know WHERE so many of us have gotten the idea that Jesus has retracted the statements He made.....or where we got the idea that He wasn't serious when He said, "Count the cost".  

Being a Christian means giving up life on earth - to the Lordship of Jesus.  It means, that He decides what He wants to do with my LIFE - the life He bought back from Hell for me. It means, He's in charge. Period. Same applies for you if you call yourself His disciple. It means you were not a free person who became a slave to Jesus. It means you were in the prison of sin.. you were headed for death... and Jesus freely gave you freedom from that.  It doesn't mean you don't have a Master. It means you've traded one in for another.

Any struggle, failures and confusion comes when we don't want to accept this.

BEING A CHRISTIAN IS NOT DIFFICULT AT ALL.....UNLESS WE TRY TO MAKE BEING A CHRISTIAN NOT DIFFICULT.

It will cost you everything you have... but it is still the best deal you'll ever make. 

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven." - JESUS, Matthew 7:21

When we are children, we don't understand that the world holds dangers, the world holds heartbreak and disappointment, the world is scary. 

We make up fearful monsters, hiding under the bed, or in the closet.  We call Mommy or Daddy... and when they walk in the room -unafraid - the monsters in the closet are proven to be just in our minds.  Our parents open the door, turn on the light, and the scary is all gone.

I think we are closest to the way God intended us all to be when we are children.  Trusting.. and dependent on our parents. And then as we get older, things get more complicated.   Life starts to chip away at the fairy tale. And the monsters in the closet - sickness, death, wars,  betrayal, financial stress,loneliness, anger, - stare right back at us, boldfaced, as we open the door.  They don't go away, they are real.  Mommy and Daddy aren't there in the next bedroom..and the peace that comes from having someone tell you, "See.  You don't have to be afraid" is not around anymore.

And though I am just a blogging freelance writing songwriter singing wife mother grandmother person - I assure you, I assure you with all the certainty there is to assure people on planet earth.. that those monsters in the closet... as real as they are.. still have a light that dispels them.. And you still have a Father who wants to say to you, "See. You don't have to be afraid."

The Light has a Name. His name is Jesus, who says, "I am the light of the world.  Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness but shall have the light of life... In this world you WILL HAVE trouble, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."

Don't be afraid.  Cry out to Jesus.  No matter what you are facing, He knows and understands. He will stand right next to you as those monsters in the closet try to make you afraid.  I'm not saying He will make them disappear... but I'm not saying He won't.

And someday......if you trust in His salvation......you will never have another monster in another closet for ten million years times ten million years times ten million years.

Just because it sounds too good to be true, doesn't mean it is.

You don't have to believe me.. but I pray that you will.

A few years ago, a young father in our town was driving his second grade daughter to school. She was eating her breakfast in the car, carrying a bottle of water. She opened the bottle with her mouth and the cap got lodged in her throat.  Her father frantically tried to dislodge it.  He could not. She passed away later that night.  Though I don't know him, never met him, the other day he came to my mind.  I told Phil and said, "Let's pray for him and his wife."  What pain they must still be enduring.

Sometimes I have been the one in pain.  And sometimes it has been difficult to find real comfort.  Maybe because I seem so strong and no one thinks I'm hurting? Or maybe my pride kept me from admitting I needed help?  Anyway,  I have had seasons in my life when the ONLY comfort I could get was from God Himself.  Which is a good thing, because now I knowthat God's comfort is the only thing that truly keeps us.

Today's blog is best expressed in a song I wrote. If you want to listen, go to the green column to the upper left of this blog and click on "The Pain Some People Feel".

"Comfort, comfort my people, says your God."

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ."

Isaiah 40:1 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

I can hardly see the words as I type this on my laptop. Why?  I was just sitting outside on the deck, swinging in my white wicker swing, in the bright, hot, Tennessee sun, reading and swinging away.   I came inside and couldn't see anything in the house. I was blinded by the light outside.  When I was basking in that glorious white hot sun I didn't realize my vision was being changed.  But it was.

The longer I stayed inside and away from that white, hot light, my vision changed also and I started to see my house the way it really was.  Dishes in the dishwasher, laundry to be folded, frying pan needing to be washed, and the top of the fireplace needing to be dusted.  When the light was blinding my eyes I couldn't see any of that.

During my temporary light induced blindness, it struck me that spiritually the same thing happens.  When I seek the face of Jesus, I am seeking Someone the Bible describes as having eyes like lightening with many crowns on His head. (Rev. 19)  When I seek Him, when I worship Him, when I gaze on Him, my "vision" changes, but I don't notice it happening. My eyes adjust to that glorious light.  And when I get back to "life" and look around me, for a while I don't notice what I noticed before I spent time gazing at His face.  There's an old song that says,"Turn your eyes upon Jesus.  Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace."  That's the truth.

But then.. the opposite is also true.  When I haven't been blinded by the light, I can easily see things about this earth and existing here. I clearly see faults in others and people begin to annoy me.  Or.. when stress overwhelms me, when worry consumes me, when unforgiveness defeats me - it's an indication to me that it's been a while since I was blinded by the light.

The clearer I can see the things around me, the clearer it is that I haven't been looking at the face of Jesus for a while. 

I want to be blinded by His light.  Again. It helps me see what's truly important. 

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."  2 Corinthians 4:18

....the past.  If I could go back twenty, twenty-five years, and undo some things i did........it would be a good thing, I suppose.  I haven't made huge mistakes in life, but I've made a few.  I haven't purposely hurt others.. but I have hurt a few.   I didn't think too highly of myself.....some of the time. 

I should have worried less.  I should have trusted more.

I should have expected less.  I should have given more.

I should have talked less.  I should have loved more.

I should have been there for people who were going through difficult,heart-wrenching days.  I should have admitted to others that I didn't have all the answers. I should have spoken up to people who were waiting to divide. I should have been someone people could trust better. I should have been someone who did not trust others so blindly.

It's hard to undo the past.  But it's more difficult for some of us to stop living there.  God is the God of today......and tomorrow.  He will forgive, and heal the past.  We are made in His image, and the key to living a life of joy is to let Him erase the past and let Him have today. 

It's impossible to undo the past.....but with the help of God... we can learn to forget it.  God knows something that we always seem to forget.. He is not mad at us for our mistakes. He just wants us to take the new day He is offering. And give it back to Him. He can undo the stupid things we've done.....if we will let Him.

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."  Isaiah 43:18-19

.......how does that statement make you feel? 

Are you ashamed that He witnessed the way you lived your life yesterday? Are you ashamed of some things you did?  Do you regret not doing more yesterday?  Did you waste the day on yourself? Were you impatient with someone?  Did you gossip about someone?

Or when you hear that sentence does it bring you joy because you know you were doing His will yesterday?  Did you lay down your life for someone yesterday? Did you love unconditionally yesterday? Did you seek Him with your whole heart yesterday?

It's interesting that the same statement can bring joy to some people and shame to others.

The wonderful thing about Jesus is that His mercy is new today.  You have a clean slate today. Today you can love Him, obey Him, love others, seek His will and seek His face. 

So that when tomorrow comes, and you hear the words, "Jesus saw what you did yesterday." 

it will bring a smile to your face.

There are few people who actually walk away from a relationship with God.  They just get discouraged about its relevance in their particular situation.

THIS IS THE KIND OF STUFF that can do you in.. and choke out the promises that God has given you in His Word. The stress that these kinds of pressures put on us... are not small things.. but BIG THINGS that can choke the Word we heard, and at first embraced, and jumped for joy over.

Don't worry about these things, Jesus says.  But many of us don't really obey those words.  We think we're helping God by worrying.. but what we don't really SEE is that we are destroying the seed that He planted in our hearts.  

When we are all choked up about the cares of life... we choke His presence away.

"Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful."  - JESUS Mark 4: 18-19

.....in the pew.  She has had an emotionally difficult day.  She hardly notices how difficult it's been because most days are like that. She has an emotionally difficult life.  She is profoundly sad inside.  It's not like her life is bad - it's just that her life isn't good.  She has no one close who truly makes her feel like she is loved. Her husband is preoccupied with business and his own agenda.  She feels alone and abandoned ....but no one knows, because she sits silently in the pew, next to him,  and smiles.....while her breaking heart keeps breaking.

She sits silently in her small group.   She would like to share her heart, she would like to let you know that she is losing hope in the God she hoped in.  She is ashamed to let anyone know that her her faith is shaking profoundly, that she longs to see someone really living the life that everyone is talking about..but all she sees is people who are focused on their own lives..She is focused on herself as well.  She would like to ask for help, to admit that her children seem to be out of control and that she lives each day with loneliness and fear, but she doesn't say a word.  She sits silently and smiles.. while her breaking heart keeps breaking.

She sits silently as the  "worship" service take place around her.  She mouths the words to songs she doesn't quite believe anymore.  She isn't sure a silent God is waiting to hear her praise. She sings the songs, but they are not coming from her heart.  She sits silently... while her failing faith keeps failing her. 

And then a miracle occurs.... a believer who is listening to the heart of her Father, God...looks at her and hears God whisper...  "She's hurting. Comfort her. " 

And in an instant, God has hands she can feel. God has a voice she can hear, God has a shoulder to lean on, God has a heart that is breaking with her heart........ God appears in human form again...only this time it's just another woman who sees through the painted on smile and wants to be God's hands on earth.

She sits silently... and weeps tears of thankfulness and healing. She believes now that God has been listening all along.  Because someone saw her heart.

And I pray that my heart will be the heart that hears - really hears -  God's Voice and extends His hand - one at a time - to all the hurting women who sit silently in the pew...with broken hearts and smiling faces.   I pray that I will speak worthy words.   I pray that I will know when someone needs a prayer, when someone needs a shoulder, when someone needs the power of God's love to cleanse the bitterness that disappointment leaves in its wake.   I pray that His Spirit will allow me to have discernment....that only He can give. 

Tomorrow, as you "go to" church.. open you heart and ask God to open your eyes so that you can see what He sees... and you can hear what He hears... and you can know what He knows.. You'd be surprised how close you are to a broken hearted women, or a disappointed mother, or a struggling married woman......who is losing hope.. and losing faith... and losing time...... 

..........as she sits silently in the pew.