The South is experiencing the 11 year (13 year?) CICADA HARVEST... as I type this.

I was expecting more of them.. I was expecting a plague of Biblical proportions, but, so far.. as of this morning.. the cicadas are just noisy.  Every now and then, one of them will fly by with that annoying, cicada buzz....but....for the most part.....they haven't been THAT annoying. 

Of course, some people I know have told stories of having to literally shovel them off their steps - sorta like you would shovel snow.  It's a hit or miss thing.. cicadaville.  (Some people pronounce it si-KADA and some pronounce it CHI-kada.  No matter how you pronounce it.. they are here)

I was sitting on my swing on my back deck this morning, and one flew by and got my attention..  I was thinking how this little locust creature was underground for more than a decade and now.. for just a short time.. lives again... and then.. back underground.   All of us have been living in peaceful quiet cicada-less bliss.....but right there.. right beneath our feet.. was a plague.  Laying there, quiet, dorment, unobtrusive...and then without warning.. "I'M BACK!!!" 

So, now, hold on to your hats.. because... when I get the chance I just SMOOSH the cicada. That's right.  I figure for every cicada I kill now.. that's one less cicada that will torment me eleven years from now.  Cicada-cide.

And sometimes.. our hearts are like that.  We bury something and think it's gone.  We ignore it. 

Maybe it's an unconfessed sin, or the guilt from an unconfessed sin.  maybe it's jealousy, or resentment. Maybe it's anger and we think it's gone because we haven't seen the person we are angry at - or we have convinced ourselves that we can deal with it.  We can bury lust.  We can bury pride.  We can bury almost anything - and convince ourselves that it is dead and gone.

But unless we confess it before the Lord, unless we ask the Holy Spirit to reveal truth to us.. unless we allow the cleansing waters of God's mercy to come in a flood our souls with His power...

we have a plague living inside us.. and eventually.. the hidden things will become evident.. and the noise of them will be deafening.

It doesn't have to be that way.  We can have a pest free heart.  We can have a plague free future.  The soil of our hearts can be completely whole.  All we have to do is to stop HIDING things. And let the Holy Spirit do His work in us.....and put to death the things that need to be put to death inside us. 

Eventually, they will surface again.  And again. And again.  When God heals a person, He heals them from the inside out.  Thank you Jesus for Your Blood.

"Surely, you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach wisdom in the inmost place.... Wash me and I will be whiter than snow."  Psalm 51:6-7

Have you ever noticed the great amount of energy that the Human Race devotes to the pursuit of not being wrong?  You haven't?  I have.

Every war begins because both sides believe they are right and the other side is wrong.

Marriages fall apart the same way.  And so do friendships.  Families are destroyed when people cannot admit they are wrong, have done something wrong or have said something wrong.  Years and years of divide and separation.

Sometimes, we get tripped up because we don't think we're ALL wrong.. We say things like, "Well it's not all my fault."

But I have discovered... when the light goes on.. and something says to my heart.. "You are wrong."  I just say, "You know what?  I'm wrong? I'm sorry." 

Peace.  Joy.  It wasn't that difficult after all.  It wasn't worth all the stress inside.. all the not admitting it.. all the effort to be right.  

In fairness.....Sometimes I am not wrong.  Sometimes I am right.  That is true.

But, I have also found that if the other person IS NOT WILLING TO ADMIT THAT THEY ARE WRONG.. nothing I say will convince them.  So when I feel that I am right and the other person doesn't agree.. I just shut up. Yes... I haven't always been this way.. but in recent years.. Maybe it's spiritual maturity.. maybe it's just aging... but.. if I don't think I am wrong.. I don't try to convince the other person that they are.  I just agree to disagree and move on.

Sometimes I am NOT wrong, but sometimes... I am. 

"Confess to one another therefore your faults (your slips, your false steps, your offenses, your sins) and pray [also] for one another, that you may be healed and restored [to a spiritual tone of mind and heart]."  James 5:16 - Amplified Bible

My husband was a great baseball player - in little league and then when he was in high school.  He was a pitcher. We started dating in high school....and so I went to his games. 

One afternoon after-school game in particular I remember.  I was sitting in front of two men who were watching him pitch.  They were really talking about him, really impressed with his pitching. Seems it was two scouts from the N.Y. Yankees.  They made him an offer.  He chose to go with music and ministry.   I'm glad he did.. but.. one thing I learned from watching him and hearing him is that the game requires great concentration. 

When he pitched, he kept his eyes focused on the spot he wanted to hit. And the batter, kept his eyes focused on the ball.  

No one involved in the game was looking at people in the stands, wondering what they were thinking, noticing the hotdogs they were eating.  No one was sitting there thinking about yesterday's game or tomorrow's.   The key to winning had a great deal to do with their eyes and where they focused them.  They had to shut the rest of the world out at that moment... in order to win the game.

As Christians, we are told to keep our focus on Jesus and our eternal kingdom.  Often, we do not.  Often, we focus on people around us.. how they live, what they are doing, what they have that we do not have.  Etc.   We might also COMPARE ourselves.. our Christianity to theirs.  Sometimes, we think we have more power.. sometimes we think we have less.  Sometimes we give up on following Jesus because we cannot see anyone else REALLY doing it.. sometimes we follow Him the way we see others following Him.. and they are not living an all or nothing life - in love with Jesus.

Sometimes the things about this place - our jobs, our health, our families, the future, the evil here, the hardships here, the unfairness here - can keep our focus off unseen things.  Eternal things.  Eternity.  This place is not our home.  The NEXT place is.  We forget that and focus on this place.  That's not the way the heros of the faith made it through. (Hebrews 11)

Today.. think about the eyes of your heart.. your spirit.. and where to keep them. What you look at determines how your day goes.

"Therefore, holy brothers and sisters, who share in the heavenly calling, fix your thoughts on Jesus, whom we acknowledge as our apostle and high priest". Hebrews 3:1

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith." Hebrews 12:1-2

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Cor. 4:18

I watched a mom at church the other day.  Her son, about 4 years old, had done something wrong and she was discussing it with him.  Her approach was to ask him "Why" he had said what he'd said.  And "Why" he had done what he'd done.  She told him to sit down in a chair and answer her. 

His childish approach was what I call - "The 'HUH?' Approach".  What is the "HUH?" approach?  After every question she asked, he said, "HUH?" like he hadn't heard, or didn't understand what she was saying. He was, seemingly, buying time to think of an answer that didn't indite him?  He was too immature to grasp the reality that he'd been caught doing something wrong?  After much haggling, he finally cried and fessed up and his mommy held him and told him she loved him.  It was nice to see such a clear picture of correction bathed in love.

Sometimes I use the "HUH?" approach with God.  His Spirit is speaking to me.  Correcting me.  Loving me.  I know what He wants.  I hear what He's saying, but I just want a little more time before I decide to obey.  Or not. 

"HUH? You want me to pray more?" or "Forgive more?" "HUH?!?!?!  Love that person MORE??"

It isn't only when He is trying to correct me.  Sometimes the Holy Spirit is trying to encourage me.  "HUH???  I shouldn't be so hard on myself? HUH?  I'm perfect to God?"  "HUH??"

"HUH??????"  YOU LOVE ME THAT MUCH????? YOU LOVE ME THAT MUCH, LORD?"

His Spirit whispers His love all day long.  all day long.  

Sometimes, He speaks to correct.  Sometimes He speaks to encourage.  

Sometimes I answer.

And sometimes I don't.

Today........I am putting aside the "HUH? approach" 

"Show me your ways, LORD,  teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long."  Psalm 25:4-5

BIG THINGS always grow from SMALL THINGS.  We often fail to see the connection between something small and the BIG effect they have on us and those around us.

A big love affair, and a long lasting marriage, and children and grandchildren started off with a small thing - like - one person thinking the other person was cute, and deciding to do something small.. like ... say hello.  At that MOMENT, AT THAT "HELLO" neither party knew that something small - "hello" -   was the beginning of a BIG LIFE TOGETHER. 

A relationship ending disagreement always starts with a little misunderstanding (song to the upper left "Little Mis-Understanding")   No one ends a relationship immediately.  It starts out with a little misunderstanding that never got resolved, and then you add another one to another one. A marriage ends one small thing at a time.  Sometimes, the big explosion at the end - an affair - seems like the reason to end it.  But trust me, there were small deaths to that marriage for a long time before. 

Something small is what doomed the human race forever.   All the sin, pain, death, sickness, fear, lust, depravity, war and every other thing that torments us started with something very small -  someone deciding to simply listen to someone else say that God's  motives - "He doesn't want you to eat that fruit because then you will be like God" -were to keep GOOD THINGS from her.  Something small - like letting that evil thought in to her heart and believing it - doomed her children to death forever.  We are all her children.  We have all sinned.  We don't believe that obeying God,doing things His way will result in the life of a peaceful heart we all crave.  So we believe lies... and reject truth.  Rejecting Truth comes with one small thing after another.

Something small is the way out - the way to life.  Something small like admitting you can't figure things out by yoursef.   Something small, like that thought in your heart that says, "I need God."  Often that small thought gets drowned out by big doubt.  But.. go with it.  Admit you need God.

God sent something small - His Son in the form of a baby - to do something so BIG that we cannot grasp it. It's SO BIG that our SMALL MINDS cannot grasp the kind of love that would send the Second Adam - Jesus - to undo the sin that the first Adam allowed in to this world.

And it takes something so small - admitting that you are unable to do things on your own, admitting that you need His forgiveness, asking Him to do what He wants to make things right between Him and you - to make the biggest change ever.  He will change you from the Kingdom of Darkness in to the Kingdom of Light.  He will change you from Death to Life.  He will change you from being in rebellion against Him in to His very Own Child.  

Something small is the biggest thing you'll ever do.

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9

Wounded? Hurting? Join the club called The Human Race. Let's face it...Life is a war zone.  War zones wound people. War zones kill people. No one gets through life without wounds.  

Sometimes we wound ourselves with habits and giving in to temptations we know will destroy us. 

Sometimes, other people wound us.  We love them and they don't love us back, we are loyal to them and they are disloyal to us. They should be there for us and they aren't. 

Sometimes, it's just circumstances that wound us so deeply to our souls that the scars are there for the rest of our lives.  Disasters, sickness,addictions...... 

We've all been wounded.  I don't care how easy you think someone else's life has been, trust me.  We've all been wounded. Another person may not be dealing with the wounds.. and the pains.. and the suffering YOU are dealing with... but they are hurting too.  In some place.  

So.. what's the point of writing this?  To remind us how difficult life can be?  No.. to let you know that the Holy Spirit - the Comforter - is there to help you through those wounded moments. 

If you are a follower of Jesus.. then..you have an Advocate, a Holy Attorney....pleading your case to God... Someone at God's Throne.. who UNDERSTANDS and FEELS you pain.  Who?  Jesus, is at the right hand of The Father, talking to Him about YOU. 

ASK THE HOLY SPIRIT TO GIVE YOU THE FAITH TO BELIEVE THIS TRUTH AND EMBRACE IT.   YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

I just want to encourage you today to remember that Jesus was wounded too - AND HE DIDN'T HAVE TO BE.  There is nothing in the whole human experience that anyone can face that He has not already faced.

The difference between your wounds and mine is that we, being human, can not avoid them.

But He, being human, could have.  He could have chosen to not be wounded for your sins and mine.  He could have chosen to just let us all die without hope.  

He CHOSE to be wounded.....so that He could send the Holy Spirit.. the Comforter.  He said to His disciples that it was good for Him to go away.. because then He could send The Comforter.

Don't believe the lie that no one understands what you are going through.  Jesus does.  Call out to Him. 

"But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed." - ISAIAH 53:5

........hahahahahahahahaha......I'M KIDDING.. OK?  You knew that, right? 

Life is never perfect.  Life, at its best can be less stressful in some seasons than it is in other seasons but life is never perfect. 

Sometimes we think if we had more than enough money.. life would be perfect.  And, truth is, certain aspects of life ARE easier when you don't have to worry about your finances or your financial future.  So.. ok.. having more than enough money might make your life eaiser.. but it wouldn't be perfect.

Sometimes we think if we have perfect health life would be perfect.  And it is true that being healthy.. makes certain aspects of your life easier.  But... You might still get sick. Or someone you love could get sick and die.  Or.... well.. you get the picture.

Sometimes we think if we could spend out lives doing nothing but what seems fun would make life perfect.. and it is true that getting a rest from working all the time is a necessary part of life.. but......no one else you know can just play all the time.. so that would be a lonely life too.

NO ONE HAS A PERFECT LIFE.  

IT IS AN UNREALISTIC GOAL... to think that you will have perfect conditions if you move somewhere.. or if you have enough money..or anything. 

PERFECTION DOES NOT EXIST ON PLANET EARTH.  BUT... THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO LIVE A MISERABLE LIFE.

 YOU CAN HAVE PEACE. You can have a peaceful day today.  You can.  God is watching you.  God loves you.  He isn't mad at you.  He wants you to trust Him.  He wants you to KNOW HIM ENOUGH so that you KNOW you can trust Him.  

You cannot have a perfect life, but you CAN HAVE PERFECT PEACE in an imperfect life.

"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast,  because they trust in You."

Isaiah 26:3

I lent my car to someone because they needed it.   We live in suburbia... no trains, buses or mass transportation.  Futhermore, we live in the country in suburbia.  You need a car around here.  At the very least a motorized bike..

It was no big deal.  I had a lot of writing assignments looming, and didn't really need to be out and about.  I had ONE appointment during the time they were borrowing the car, and they brought the car back for a few hours, at exactly the moment I needed to use it.  Then I gave it back to them for their own use. A day or two later, however, when their car was repaired they returned my car with a great big "thank you" and some flowers in a vase.  

In the same way, "this is the day the LORD has made."  This day belongs to God.  He is letting me borrow it.  He is giving me life, He is providing what I need for today... In Him I live and move and have my being.   I have LIFE because God gives life.

I cannot imagine what I would have felt like if the friends I was lending my car to became annoyed at me because I needed them to let me borrow back what I had given to them in the first place.  I can't imagine them saying something like, "WHAT???? You want the car for two hours???? You need to go to the doctor? BUT I'M USING THE CAR TO GET NAIL POLISH AT WALMART!!!"

God owns my life.  My day. And every minute in it.  Jesus example to us all is that we live to DO THE WILL OF THE FATHER.  So, He has a will for my life today, (and tomorrow and the next day).   And He has given me my life so that I can accomplish His will for it.  Who knows what His will is?  He does.  That's why when I don't spend time with Him.. I feel lost and confused and directionless.  

So, rather than being annoyed when He requires me to lay my life down for someone, or serve someone, or whatever.......my attitude should be more like the people I lent my car to.  Thankful for the use of His day.  Thankful for being able to be alive.   Remembering that I am not my own, but I am bought with a price.  And rather than thinking I own my day, my life.. and that my plans are the only plans that matter......

When I get up in the morning and plan my day, my heart attitude shouldn't be that I have the RIGHT to use my time without God's interference.. but..

My heart attitude should be... "This is what I'd like to do today.  Dear God, may I borrow Your day?" 

The past few days have been good days for me.  A good day for me is when I get to be quiet... read....talk to God.  Life is busy and sometimes I miss my Best Friend. And although to the world I appear as someone who likes to talk...(and I don't blame the world for having that impression... because I do talk quite a bit) God knows me so well.. and He knows (as does my husband, Phil) that at my core.. I like to be quiet.  Nothing makes me happier than being quiet... reading.. writing stuff... being still. 

Anyway... whenever I get quiet enough to talk to Him, I find myself apologizing for myself.  Like I owe Him an apology.. rather than coming home to Him.  I apologize for not spending enough time in prayer, for not reading the Bible enough, for not really listening enough.  I review times in the past when who I am was not enough - and I failed.  I think about that I wasn't a good enough friend.. wife.. pastor's wife....mother.. daughter.....Christian.   I wonder about so many "what if's".....What if I hadn't said that? What if I hadn't gossiped? What if I hadn't given up so quickly? What if I hadn't been so full of myself and pride?  What if I hadn't thought of myself so highly?  What if I would have not let someone get away with villifying me?  What if? What if?

And the "what ifs" don't only apply to me.  No, they also apply to others. "What if I would have taken another path?" "What if they would have talked to me instead of talking about me to others?" "What if they would have had the mercy FOR me that they demanded from me?"  "What would have happened if I would have taken that path?" "What if someone would have seen my heart?"   "What if they would be open and real instead of being fake and hiding their double life?"  I think of people who could have loved me more, trusted me more.  I think of people who lied to me, betrayed me.  "What if they had not?"

The "what ifs" also haunt the future.. bringing anxiety that doesn't come from Him. "What if we don't have enough?" "What if sickness comes?" "What if someone dies?" "What if life gets more difficult than it is?""What if.. what if... what if..."

The "what ifs" are not my friend.  

And then.....like coming home after a long hot day at a job I cannot handle -  exhausted by the very act of being alive - and because of His quiet presence... I just throw all the "What ifs" at His feet. 

I cannot figure it out anymore.  I am sorry for my failure.  I am sorry I'm not perfect. I am sorry I actually expected myself to be.  I am sorry others fail.  I am sorry others are not perfect. I am sorry I expected them to be. 

And it just takes a few moments.. just a few holy moments.. and I remember once again that He doesn't want my apology.. He just wants ME. Nothing is hidden from His wonderful loving eyes.  He gives me the secret of life once again. He tells me how to keep walking, how to finish strong.  He says, 

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past." (Isaiah 43:18)

And He reminds me that there is no point in What if's.. because.. they don't exist.  He can make the crooked path straight.  It doesn't matter how much I have failed Him.. He will take care of the people I have failed.....If I ask Him to.. He will fix MY mistakes.  It's called MERCY.  and it doesn't matter how much others have failed me.. He will take care of me.  It's called MERCY.  He has it for them. He has it for me.

And just like that... with a little bit of time talking to the Love Of My Life... and ten Words from His Word that The Comforter makes alive... I can forgive myself.. forgive others.. and notice how beautiful the life He gives can be. 

What if the only moment that matters to Him is this one? How easy life would be.

How light and easy life actually is when the "what if's" disappear.

I have my own little theory about life which I have held for years.  I think that most people, in the span of a normal lifetime, get about 50 GREATEST days.  I'm not talking about good days, or fun days, or happy days.  I'm talking about those days like Wedding Days, the birth of your child Days, you won the lottery Days, you got a promotion Days.  Days that are MILESTONE days.   Now in my theory, there are days that might surprise you as being on of your 50 Greatest Days - a day when you go for a ride and the weather is perfect and you just have fun looking at flea markets or yard sales or jumping in a creek with cold water running over rocks.  OR the days your friend from PA flies down to spend a few days with you on your birthday. 

But generally speaking, 365 days a year... are NOT one of our 50 Greatest Days.  And I think, that sometimes, we don't really comprehend that the reality is that LIFE is just a series of regular days.  Days you do your job, clean your house, go to church, raise your kids, love your friends. 

This is life.  And some of us, I believe, want every day to be one of the Fifty Greatest Days. But that is not possible.  It isn't reality. 

The secret of life is enjoying the little things.  Being thankful for the nice things you have and not sulking because someone else has something you want.

You may ask, "Do some people get more than Fifty Greatest Days"

OK.. so the other day started out really busy. I was running and running, and found myself doing my last chore before heading home - the supermarket. 

By now it was after 3PM and I hadn't eaten anything all day.  I was STARVING. (not literally.. but.. that's the term I use when I feel extreme hunger pangs)

As I was putting the food on the conveyer belt in the check out line - suddenly, the small bag of potato chips there - found its way on to the conveyer belt and in to my cart.  How?  Evidently my hand did the dirty work.

I put the groceries in the back of the car, but the chips found their way to my hand, and my mouth as I drove home.  and when the hunger pangs had subsided....I was SO SORRY I had eaten such junk food.

And the Holy Spirit whispered to me, "Starving people will eat anything.  They don't care if it's good for them or not, they just want the hunger to stop.  Furthermore, they will take food from anyone who offers it."

It's like He opened the eyes of my heart for a moment to see that the world is filled with starving people.  Starving for life, for love, for acceptance, for meaning, for something that is real. We are starving in our very souls...and keep eating junk food to try and ease that hunger.

For a split second I felt the compassion of the Holy Spirit toward the people around me. 

People know that some of the things they are doing are bad and wrong - but they want the hunger to stop. 

So........It isn't really that the young married woman WANTS to be having an affair with a woman co-worker.....and lose her husband and family if she is discovered.....but that she has a hunger she has not let Jesus fill.  She won't believe it when people say, "Let Jesus fill that hunger inside you for the love you never had."

So.......It isn't really lust that keeps someone addicted to pornography, gambling, drugs ...but a deep hunger that Jesus has not been asked - or allowed -  to fill.

So......It isn't money or position that keeps an executive looking for more and more.. but a hungry spirit that has not been revived by Jesus. 

It isn't the hunger that destroys us - but what we use to fill it. 

I am reminded once again, that it is those of us who know the BREAD OF LIFE who must be offering Him to a spiritually starving world.  A starving person will eat anything.  Let's offer that person the only thing that will fill his/her hunger.  

And to that person who may be reading this.. who may have actually gotten down this far and read this... it's not by chance you are reading this.  Call upon the name of the Lord.  Give the hunger to God.  Ask HIM to cleanse you and fill you with HIS LOVE.  Call on Jesus.  (Send me an email if you'd like.. and I will pray with you.  marie@mariearmenia.com)

"Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him." Psalm 34:8

In order to solve a problem, first you must identify what it is.  This seems simple enough.  I would have to say that most people who are struggling with discouragement and  disillusionment..........are people who have a hard time identifying the problem.  I'm not talking about people who are dealing with real distress.. like death,clincial depression, danger, despair.

SO.. THEN..

WHY ARE YOU SO NEGATIVE ALL THE TIME?

Are you hungry and unable to find food? 

Are you sick and unable to find medicine?

Are you thirsty and unable to find clean water?

Are you in danger and unable to find protection?

For a great majority - MAJORITY - of people living on this planet.. the answer to at least one (maybe more) of those questions would be "YES".

So then if you (and I) cannot answer "yes" to ANY of those questions... then what exactly is our problem?

We don't - acutally have one.

The problem is..............................a lack of thankfulness for what we have. Expecting more than we deserve.  Wanting more than we need.  Focusing on what we DON'T HAVE RATHER THAN WHAT WE DO.   

NO ONE EVER SAID WE WOULD NOT HAVE STORMS.  He will get us through them. 

He does not lie.  He is God.

Start thanking God for what you have today and let Him worry about making sure you always have what you need.

Problem identified.

Problem solved. 

You live your life as though God might let you down.  You aren't living in peace but you are afraid.. You aren't thankful you are angry.  You don't know if you can trust Him.

Look back on your life.

You thought He would desert you in your storms.  Has He?

You didn't know if He would get you through them. Has He?

You weren't sure He would actually provide.  Has He?

You weren't sure He could really take the guilt away?  Has He?

You weren't sure He could forgive the things you've done. Has He?

You didn't think He would hear your prayer. Has He?

You thought He'd make you pay for your mistakes?  Has He?

You couldn't believe He could retore things to you that had been stolen.  Has He?

You thought He might break some of His promises.  Has He?

He said He would never leave you or forsake you.  Has He?

Forget not the benefits of the Lord.  If you will really look at your life.. and remember the situations you thought were hopless... and without remedy.. you will see that somehow.. God has gotten you through.  The storms were - and are - difficult but they do not destroy you.  The heartbreak and disappointment seem beyond bearing at times - but you bear them and get through them.

God has promised to be faithful to you.  Has He? 

Then... change your words today.  And say, OUT LOUD, the things that God has brought you through..

And.. will get you through.

He HAS been faithful.

He WILL be faithful to you. Even when you are not faithful to Him.  He hasn't shown you anything but MERCY.  He has not made you pay for your mistakes. Has He?  

He's been faithful. Yes He has.